The Can-Can (Demo)
Transcript
[Song: Morpheus (Spike Jones Parody)]
Crusty: (singing)
Ma chere, ma chere Joli toujours contraire Donnez-moi le donnez chef Donnez donnez be half safe Cheri, cheri, you look like Gene Autry Your figure is like Trigger, ma cheri Bon vie von vie, von bon mot Moe? Bon vie Vaughn Monroe B.O What ze Hildegard, cheri
[Applause]
Oo la la! Bonjour!
Chuck E. Cheese:
Hey Crusty, where did you learn to speak French?
Crusty:
My great grandfather was French, he worked in a cat house.
[Audience Laughter]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Oh yeah?
Crusty:
That’s where he met his wife Fifi, but he divorced her.
Chuck E. Cheese:
Why?
Crusty:
‘Cause she was a dog!
[Audience Laughter]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Hey, wait a minute- wait a minute. Cats can’t marry dogs, it’s unnatural.
Crusty:
No you don’t understand she was a cat, but boy what a dog!
[Audience Laughter]
You see, Fifi used to dance in the can-can.
Chuck E. Cheese:
What’s a can-can? Two toilets side by side?
[Chuck & Audience Laugh]
Jasper T. Jowls:
Duhh my cousin used to dance around in the can.
[Jasper Laughs]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Would ‘ya shut up ‘ya beagle brain!
Crusty:
Now I’ll do the song that made Fifi the most famous pussy in Paris.
[Song: Morpheus (Spike Jones Parody)]
Crusty: (singing)
La La-la-la-la La la La-la-la-la La la La-la-la-la la Take it Jasper!
Jasper T. Jowls: (singing)
Gah gah Guh-guh-guh-guh Gah gah Guh-guh-guh-guh Gah gah Guh-guh-guh-guh gah Guh-dl-dl-dy Guh-dl-dl-dl-dl-dy Guuh Guh-guh-guh-guh Gah gah Guh-guh-guh-guh Gah gah Guh-guh-guh-guh Guh-guh-guh-guh guh
Crusty: (singing)
Everybody sing!
All: (singing)
La La-la-la-la La-la-la-la-la-la La La-la-la-la La-la-la-la-la-la
[Everyone begins overlapping la’s to parts of the melody]
La-la-la-la la, la, la, la-
[Pasqually Begins Repeated Sneezing Followed By Horns & Random Instruments]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Oh he’s not gonna do this again, watch it- close the doors!
[Slipping sound]
Aw jeez.
[Sneezing Halts]
[Gunshot, Body Falls]
[Musical Sting]
[Pasqually Sneezes]
[Audience Applause]